“Money Taken Out of a Pocket or Wallet Will Be Taxed Too. This Tax Money Will Be Used to Help Vijay Mallaya.” – Arun Kaitley

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BJP Govt. has failed miserably in bringing back the black money as they promised in their manifesto while contesting Lok Sabha elections during 2014. So, now our Finance Minister Mr. Arun Kaitley has formed a unique alternative plan which is to tax the common man as much as they can so that it can compensate the losses Govt. has to incur because of its inability to bring back black money.

Govt. is well determined to demotivate the saving habit of people by putting all sorts of taxes when you make a withdrawal out of your own saving. As if it was not good enough, now our most intelligent FM Mr. Arun Kaitley has taken a step forward by making a fresh announcement of putting a tax on the money you take out of your pocket or wallet. When asked, why, Mr. Kaitley answers, “since the money lying in pocket/wallet is also a sort of saving, we will tax it.”

“We will not allow anyone in this country to save anything because it will lead to more accumulation of black money. So we will tax all of your savings and hence this new tax on the money taken out of a pocket or wallet,” he said while addressing a press conference which was attended by only two news channels, Zee News and India TV (others were not allowed to attend this press conference). However, Mind The News reporter Mr. Lundar Prasad Chaurasia some how got hold of pass to enter and attend this press conference.

The moment he announced this new tax, Mr. Sudhir Chaudhary (from ZEE TV) and Mr. Rajat Sharma (from India TV) jumped out of joy from their seats and started shouting slogans, Modi jindabad, Modi jindabad.

Our reporter Lundar Prasad Chaurasia questioned the FM on how this will be implemented and how the Govt. will come to know about the money taken out from a pocket or a wallet. He said, “we shall hire a special force of volunteers who will be positioned all over the country at fixed distance. The job of these volunteers will be to keep a close watch on the people taking out money from their pocket/wallet and they will tax them right there.”

Lundar Prasad further questioned, ” what kind of development works will the money collected in such a manner will be spent on.”? Listening too many cross questions made FM Mr. Kaitley real angry because Sudhir Chaudhary and Rajat Sharma were keeping mum all the time and our reporter was grilling the FM a real hard.

Arun-Jaitley-tax-on-saving-satire
abey BC, kya kya puchh raha hai yeh repoter.

Fuming Kaitlety, said “this is rubbish to spent the money on development work at this moment. So, we are not going to spent such a precious money on any kind of development work because that is not needed. Don’t you know, our dear Industrialist friend Mr. Vijaya Mallaya is in such a big trouble. He is not able to pay back the loan of just Rs. 8000 Crores. So we will use this money to give it to him so that he can come out of defaulters list and live his life peacefully. Remaining money (if any left) will be handed over to Ambanis and Adanis so that they can put it to good use by investing it in their businesses.”

vijay mallaya defaulter
Vijay Mallaya’s Reaction After Listening to FM’s Plan.

“But our farmers are also in big trouble, They are committing suicide because they are unable to pay back their loans of meager amounts. So why are you not doing something for them too”. Lundar further asked Kaitley.

Kaitley answered, “yes, we love our farmers too and we have a plan to help them as well. From now onwards, any farmer who commit suicide, we will give money to his family to complete his last rites. This money will be given to a farmer’s family as a loan which they will have to payback with interest within a month’s time. However, this special loan will be given to fund only one suicide per family”.

Lundar Prasad Chaurasia was speechless and left with teary eyes while Sudhir Chaudhary (ZEE) and Rajat Sharma (India TV) were still there to attend the dinner and drinks party arranged specially for them by Vijay Mallaya.

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